BY FRANCIS CROT
Samantha Hollybrook earned a badge called Carnage.
I saw one once where . . .
6 months at Brownies.
Naughty – refused to do tasks, refused to sit at table, just ran round.
Housewife stuff – ironing, cup of tea, sandwich, boring, stressful, got told off.
Pulled a girl’s hair.
Literature badge. Rude poem. Didn’t realise it was rude. “I wish I were a moron – my God, perhaps I am!”
Made her sit in the other room. Bit confused.
Sitting in entrance to church hall. Nanny came into entrance with other mummies. Brown Owl came and said they’d been having trouble and she shouldn’t come back.
Cache of automatic weapons.
A little girl will fly twenty yards if you shoot her in the right place.
Brown Owl’s eyes gouged out, so doesn’t know the thing glued to her forehead when stumbling into survivors’ den a grenade.